Ten Absolutes that Change Your World
One of the most interesting and difficult parts of working with people is helping them help themselves. Of course, listening is a big part of that as well as not inserting my own experiences as solutions, but rather helping them uncover what may be hiding their success. It’s difficult because we all come to the decision to change differently and there are very few absolutes when it comes to physical change. What is supremely interesting is that anyone can do it, and in pretty much any way that they decide.
So then, here is the difficulty again. We can agree that what works for one person won’t necessarily work for someone else. We know this is true because it has played out in each of our own lives. Two children from the same family will turn out two different ways. In fact, even something that has worked well for you at one stage of life may not have worked 10 years earlier or won’t work again in 10 years. So how are we supposed to know how, when and what to change, when it’s all just a guessing game?
Last week I cleaned out the inside of our refrigerator. This is not a regularly scheduled task on my cleaning schedule and it was LONG overdue. I open the fridge at least 20 times a day, as do all the other people who live with me. With that much exposure, you’d think it would occur to me that I should clean it frequently, or at least, get the crumbs off the shelves and throw away the three old jars of pickles! But, sadly, this task is rarely on my list. As with many revelations that come to me, doing a very small, insignificant chore often brings me such satisfaction and clarity, that I kick myself for not having done it sooner.
I know I’m not the only one who feels better from working and cleaning and organizing and exercising and sleeping well and reading and interacting and praying. These are things that are good for all of us. They are parts of our daily routine, and yet, they can often be the things that we compromise about or don’t have time for or think we can procrastinate about. No one even noticed, until I pointed it out, that the fridge was cleaned. It didn’t make cooking any easier or change the way the food tasted, but when I opened the door, I was not annoyed. I feel the same way when the laundry is under control, the meals have been planned, the workouts have been finished, the emails have been replied to; it’s the sense that you’re getting something accomplished that’s valuable and helpful.
So my clean refrigerator reminded me whether I think I have time, feel the energy to follow through or have the space in my schedule, there are certain absolutes that I must do. When we decide we can’t or won’t do them, something slips and we are less than our best, and whether we want to admit it or not, we feel the difference. The most important decision then that we can make, is to attempt to do those things which are the most life-giving every day. And here’s where we get to be our own persons, not cookie cutting what works for someone else.
You know those lists of Top Ten foods or exercises or popular movies, or anything interesting? These absolutes are similar to those; they are most commonly used DAILY by most people who feel their best:
Spend a few moments praying and being quiet by yourself before the day starts. Read scripture and positive inspiration. Affirm your beliefs.
Drink tea, coffee, warm lemon water or green juice in the morning.
Eat 3-5 meals from foods lightly or unprocessed.
Move more the 5,000 steps.
Formally exercise most days of the week or have a physical job that makes you lift heavy things frequently.
Read 30 minutes.
Interact with family, friends and coworkers in honest and inviting conversations.
Be outside.
Drink lots of water and not a lot of other drinks.
Sleep 7+ hours.
If you’re still reading this, you may be tempted to feel disappointed in the top ten absolutes. They don’t change anything big and in fact, no one keeps track or even notices whether you do them at all. You’ve probably read lists like this many other times or maybe even made your own list. If so, then here are the questions we all need to answer:
Are we doing these things consistently enough to make ourselves better, and therefore, the world we influence better?
And if not, why not?
And if not, when will you start?
And if not these things, what things will you determine are absolutes for you?
And if so, then what else should you start to do?
These are things that are insignificant alone but amplify their outcome when combined with other seemingly small things. Nothing meaningful ever starts big; it’s always small. We need to remember that when we’re tempted to sluff off and not do all the small stuff.
If inconsistency is your stumbling block, then realize this: It doesn’t matter which small thing you do first, just do it. Start with something you will commit to doing easily, and maybe this time, knowing that the multiplied effect of small things will eventually add up, your easy task will be the catalyst you need to make things stick. You’ll find commitment and discipline and self-control and a deep desire to help others. When you prioritize the absolutes, you’ll improve more than just yourself.
